Chapter 5 - What Patricia SaidI looked at Emily, then Rosalind. "What happened between us created this situation. If I hadn't hurt you two years ago, you wouldn't have had to choose."

Warrick shook his head. "Don't make yourself responsible for everything."

"I created the rupture."

"You did," he said gently. "But Emily isn't a consequence of your mistake. She's a person who needed someone. She needed family. So I tried to be family until the rest of you figured yourselves out."

Before I could answer, the door opened. Patricia walked in and stopped when she saw me.

"Cathy."

"Pat."

Neither of us moved for a moment. Then she sat down. "I wanted to tell you."

"I know."

"Emily asked me not to."

"I know that too."

Her face tightened. "I was afraid you'd say something again."

The truth stung. "I understand."

"I've been angry with you."

"You had every reason."

"I still am."

"Okay."

"She was devastated after that phone call, Cathy." Her voice cracked. "She was my daughter, and I couldn't fix what you'd done."

"I know."

"And you barely kept trying."

"I called twice."

"Exactly."

I looked down. "I thought continuing would make things worse."

"You should have kept trying."

She was right.

The four of us sat together in that maternity room, Rosalind between us — three days old, knowing nothing about arguments, estrangement, pride, or the strange ways adults make love unnecessarily complicated.

Finally Patricia asked, "What happens now?"

"Now I do better," I said.

She shook her head. "You can't just say that and expect—"

"I know," I said, stopping her gently. "I don't expect anything quickly. I know trust doesn't come back because I apologize once." I looked at Emily. "I'm only asking whether there's a possibility."

Emily stared at Rosalind. Then she surprised me. "I was going to call you. Before I left the hospital."

"Why?"

She smiled sadly. "Because I've been lying here for three days looking at her and thinking about what kind of family I want her to have. And I don't want there to be an empty space where you're supposed to be." Her eyes filled. "I don't want her growing up without you because you and I couldn't figure this out."

"Emily—"

"But I need you to be different."

"I am."

"I need you to prove it."

That was fair. "I know."

"You can't trust me because I say I've changed. You'll have to see it in what I do."

"Yes. Will you let me try?"

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For a long moment she said nothing. Then she looked down at Rosalind and held the baby toward me.

It was such a small movement. It meant everything.