Chapter 4 - What Erin Carried Alone

Callie sat there completely still. The refrigerator hummed. Out in the yard, somebody's car door thumped shut.
"Your sister," she finally said.
"Yes."
"So I'm your niece."
Erin's jaw went tight. "You are my daughter. That has never once changed. Not for a single day."
"But you lied." Callie's voice didn't rise, and somehow that was worse than screaming. "For eighteen years, you looked at me every morning and you lied."
"I was protecting you."
"From WHAT?" Callie turned to Adrian. "From him?"
Adrian shook his head slowly. "Your mother — Rachel — and I weren't together anymore when she passed. We were young. We'd already ended it before she even knew she was pregnant." He stopped. "I didn't find out you existed until after she was gone."
"Then how's your name on that paper?" I asked.
"Erin came and found me," he said. "About two months after Rachel passed. Showed up at my apartment and told me the whole thing." He looked at her. "She told me she was going to raise the baby herself. She asked me to sign as the biological father so the record would be complete. For medical history. For Callie's sake, down the road."
"And you signed."
"I signed."
"But you never told me." I turned to my wife. "You were pregnant — or you said you were — and you sat across from me every night and told me none of this."
Erin lifted her eyes for the first time. "I wasn't lying about being pregnant. I was pregnant. I lost that baby at eleven weeks." Her voice dropped almost to nothing. "The seventh one."
The whole room seemed to tilt.
"Rachel went into labor the same week I miscarried," Erin said. "She was by herself. She called me from the hospital, terrified. I got in the car and drove four hours straight through." She swallowed. "She didn't survive the second night."
Callie made a small sound, the kind you can't hold back.
"I held you in that hospital room," Erin said, and now she was looking only at Callie, like the rest of us had left. "You were three days old. You had Rachel's chin. You had her hands, exact copies." Her voice frayed but didn't break. "And I knew — I knew — I was not walking out of that building without you."
"So you came home and told Dad you'd given birth," Callie said.
"Yes."
"You let him think—"
"Yes."
Callie stood up. She walked to the window over the sink and turned her back on all three of us.
Adrian looked at me. "I'm sorry you're finding out like this. In front of a yard full of people."
"Did you know she never told me?" I asked him.
He hesitated. One beat too long.
"You knew," I said.
"She told me you knew," he said quietly. "I had no reason not to believe her. I'm sorry."
I looked at Erin. She looked at her hands.
"Eighteen years," I said. "Eighteen birthdays. Eighteen Christmases. And not once did you think I could handle the truth."
"I was scared," she said. "At the start, I told myself I'd explain it when the moment was right. And then the moment kept sliding further away, and you loved her so much, and I—" She stopped and pressed her lips together. "I convinced myself the truth could only take something away from us. All three of us."
"That wasn't yours to decide."
"I know that."
"She's my kid, Erin. I raised her. I earned the right to know where she came from."
"I know."
"Then say it like you actually believe it."
Erin looked up. Her eyes were streaming now, though her voice stayed level. "I was wrong. I was wrong to keep it from you, and I was wrong to keep it from her. I've known that for years. I just didn't know how to stop."
Callie turned back around from the window. "Who else knew?"
May you like
Erin and Adrian traded a look. Half a second too long.
"Who else?" Callie said again.