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Chapter 8 - The Man With My Eyes

I told Marcus everything, right there in the hallway, and then again once we'd sat back down in Mr. Whitmore's office.

He listened the way he always listened — completely still, his coffee forgotten in his hands, his eyes locked on my face. When I finished, he didn't speak right away. He looked at the wall for a moment, then back at me.

"He thinks Simon might be your son," he said.

"Yes."

"And Simon knows."

"According to the letter, yes."

Marcus set his cup down on the small side table. "How do you feel?"

"I don't know yet," I said. "Ask me again in an hour."

Mr. Whitmore came back in, and we spent the next forty minutes going through the formal side of the estate. Edmund had left a modest but meaningful sum, and had directed that if Vivian Ashford was ever located, and if she chose to pursue a DNA test, the estate would cover the cost regardless of what it revealed.

He'd thought of everything. Even dying, he'd tried to make it easier on me.

"Simon Hargrave is aware this meeting is happening today," Mr. Whitmore said. "He asked me to pass along his contact information, and to tell you there's no pressure and no timeline. He'll wait as long as you need."

He slid a small card across the desk. A name, a phone number, an email address. I picked it up.

On the drive home, Marcus asked, "Do you want to call him?"

"I want to think first," I said.

"That's fair."

"Marcus." I kept my eyes on the road. "If it's true — if the test comes back positive — you'll have a brother you never knew existed."

He was quiet for a moment. "I know."

"How does that sit with you?"

Another pause. Longer this time. "I feel like Grandma has a lot to answer for," he said finally. "And I feel like you deserved a lot better than what you got. And I feel like — " He stopped, then finished more quietly. "If there's a person out there who's family, I'd rather know than not know."

I reached over and put my hand briefly on his arm.

That afternoon, I called Emily. Then Rachel. Then Nathan, Julia, and Lily, one by one, each call its own version of the same long silence followed by the same careful, halting questions. Lily cried. Nathan said very little but stayed on the phone for twenty minutes anyway. Julia said, "Mom, you have to meet him."

"I know," I said.

"When?"

"Soon."

I waited two full days — not out of reluctance, but because I needed to be steady before I walked into that meeting. I didn't want to arrive still raw from the letters, the solicitor's office, the arithmetic I kept doing in my head at three in the morning.

On the third day, I picked up the card and dialed.

It rang twice. "Hello?" A man's voice, younger-sounding than I'd braced for, though I couldn't have told you what I'd expected instead.

"Simon," I said. "My name is Vivian. I think you've been expecting my call."

A breath. Then: "Yes. I have." A pause. "Thank you for calling."

"Would you like to meet?" I asked.

"Very much," he said. "Whenever you're ready."

We settled on the following Saturday. A café halfway between us. Neutral ground, he said — and I appreciated that he'd thought to say it that way, that he understood why it mattered.

I told Emily the plan. She asked if I wanted company.

"No," I said. "This one, I need to do alone."

Saturday came in gray and cold, the kind of late-autumn morning that makes everything feel significant whether it deserves to or not. I arrived ten minutes early and picked a table near the window where I could watch the door.

He walked in right on time.

I knew him before he'd even crossed half the room. Not because I was hunting for resemblance. Not because I'd braced myself for it. But because some things the body recognizes before the mind has finished catching up, and the moment Simon Hargrave stepped through that door in his dark coat, hands a little uncertain at his sides, something in me went very quiet and very sure all at once.

He had Edmund's height. Edmund's careful, upright posture. But his eyes — that particular shade, that slight downward tilt at the outer corner — those were mine. I'd seen them in my own mirror my whole life.

He stopped at the table. He looked at me. And I watched his face do exactly what mine was doing — recognition landing before either of us found any words for it.

"Vivian," he said.

"Simon," I said. "Sit down. Please."

He sat. We looked at each other across the small table for a long moment.

"I don't know how to start this," he admitted.

"Neither do I," I said. "So let's just start anyway."

He smiled — a careful smile, uncertain at the edges, the smile of someone who's been waiting a long time for a door to open and isn't quite sure yet what's standing on the other side.

"My father talked about you," he said. "Not often. But when he did, he was different. Quieter. Like he was handling something breakable."

"I didn't know he still thought about me," I said. "I assumed he'd moved on completely."

"He had," Simon said. "He loved my mother. I want you to know that. But two things can both be true at once."

"Yes," I said softly. "They can."

We ordered tea. We talked for two hours straight. He told me about his job, his apartment, the dog he'd had since college. I told him about my six kids, my grandkids, the grocery store mornings and the office-cleaning nights and the apple tree still standing in my garden.

At some point he asked, "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"Are you scared of what the test might show?"

I actually thought about it honestly before answering. "No," I said. "I think I'm more scared of what it might not show. Of sitting here, feeling what I'm feeling right now, and being told it's nothing."

He looked down at his hands, then back up at me. "I feel it too," he said. "Whatever this is."

"Then we'll find out," I said. "Together."

He nodded. Outside the window, the gray morning had shifted without either of us noticing — a thin winter sun breaking through the clouds, falling right across the table between us, landing on Simon Hargrave and his eyes that were my eyes. I thought: whatever the test says, this man buried his father five months ago and came here anyway.

May you like

That meant something.

That meant everything.

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